Thursday, July 17, 2014

Bikini Body

If you are on facebook at all, you've probably seen at least one of those body positive image memes. Numerous blogs were developed for it, for one size or another, mostly for all shapes and sizes. Woman of all shapes and sizes proudly showing their swimwear clad bodies with a nofucksgiven attitude. And that is wonderful, really is. I will never grace the cover of a magazine (unless its for notorious reasons, like yarn bombing the white house), I will never be sought after for photo shoots. I won't even become an instagram "hottie", I take a lot of yarn photos. The message is not one to discourage, love yourself is a great thing to do. But it's easier adding text over an inspirational image than it is to do in practice.

Why bring this up? Because my parents are treating my daughter to a day at a water park. She is old enough (and tall enough, she won't STOP GROWING!) to go on the rides herself, but it really isn't all that fun to do it alone. So, Mommy is on the chopping block. Grandma doesn't even own a bathing suit. Now I know I won't be the only mom in a suit, I know I won't be the only one with stretch marks, a case of the jiggles that shames Jell-o, and a sense of agony every time the suit creeps up. I know I won't be the heaviest lady there, and I know I won't be the skinniest. I'll be just a face in the crowd, one of many to the workers and a background character to the other attendees. I have a ready finger and a smart mouth to anyone who decides to bash me for daring to don spandex. None of that bothers me. What bothers me is that I hate how I look, especially exposing that much of myself in the highly hated areas. I own two swimsuits and in the two, three years I've owned them, I've never worn them. One has a skirt, why I don't know. We know what is under them, and once they are wet and stuck to your legs they don't hide anything. Both are floral, and not a small pattern either. Why do companies think we want flashy bright designs? I want a PLAIN option! I'm not saying everyone wants a plain suit, some people prefer the bright ones but I am not one of them. I know I need to set an example for my daughter, to show that it doesn't matter what you look like. To give her a realistic view of what some people do look like. But that doesn't make me any more comfortable. Seeing her smile will be worth every painful minute, though.

So what else? Knitting updates!

Still plugging away at the Vlad shawl, I like it but it's become an unwieldy number of stitches and it takes forever to get to the end of a row. I'm determined to finish it this week. I was going to be house/dog sitting for a week and had a bag full of projects packed (projects before clothes, naked but I'll have shawls!). Now that I'm not needed for that, I can minimize my projects. That one is staying, I really want to finish it and block it, but what do I want to thin out? Scarves? More shawls? UFO's that are mocking me? Probably the scarves, I like the pattern but it requires a cable needle (for me, I know some of you can do it without one) and that isn't travel friendly. My ren fest knitting is at a pause, I finished the flail, but my axe blade is being a pain. Yarn is in timeout.

                                           Photo
swingable to boot!


I'm also working on the Elder Tree Shawl, an adjustable version of the Lonely Tree Shawl, both are free downloads by Sylvia Bo Bilvia. I'm using acrylic (gasp!) for both and hoping for a decent outcome. I still have to finish sewing up the wizard robe, I finished Hubs tunic thingie. The trousers I passed on, the fabric shredded too easily and I didn't want a wardrobe malfunction in the middle of the festival. I keep coming to terms with the fact that I am a terrible sewing person. I can do an ok pouch, however. Have I mentioned that I haven't even touched my costume yet? Because I'm fighting with costumes for the 6'+ crowd which means spreading fabric on the PORCH because I don't have enough space unless I move furniture? I still have about 3 weeks, well two with one of those being spend at my parents. Not house sitting, but house working. The joys of being an able bodied and nearby offspring of DIY-ers.

My exercise plan I posted before? Trying to get back into it. I caught a very nasty plague from the hellspawn, talking gross lung batter. Still coughing up ick thanks to my allergy ridden sinuses feeding my lungs. So I had to give up for a while, bending at all induced a dizzying coughing fit let alone sit ups. I still don't have full breathing capacity back, it was that bad, so I'm keeping it at a day 1, 2, 3 level for a while instead of advancing. But I keep getting distracted by shiny new books, think I could work out and read?

Wednesday, July 2, 2014

The Deadline Cometh

There is an awesome renaissance festival downstate, try to visit every year with a group of friends. I dress up every time, great excuse to wear a corset. Plus, the actors will interact with you if you do dress up, they treat you as you are costumed. My brother and his then wife dressed as peasants and were ordered around, they had a blast. This year, my husband is getting in on the act, he's always been willing but not able to dress up. Friends of ours are also going, and I'm providing some costume help with them. Know those DIY instructions that have all this stuff on hand for amazing projects? I'm not one of them. By sheer luck, most of my costume came from the thrift store or stuff from old costumes (except the corset, buying a new one. Moresca, highly recommend them for product and friendly staff). There will be photos, I'll share my stupid easy stuff with you. Right now I'm making a spell book from a hardcover library discard. A robe and trousers from a king sized flat sheet and pillowcases. Actual stuff you might have on hand or can get cheap at a thrift store. The sheets I had purchased at the Christmas Tree Shop for $20, and that was the most expensive thing so far. They sucked on my bed, that satin backing meant every time I got up, I slid. But there is no reason you couldnt grab a sheet for near nothing at a garage sale and dye it (Rit dye, laundry aisle at your grocery store). Pouches? Fabric scraps from the thrift stores and the remnant bin at Walmart and JoAnns. Totally doable stuffs, folks. I'm also knitting weapons, they will end up being used at later gaming sessions by the DM. Free patterns for a flail (she has it listed as a morning star), an axe, and a sword can be found on ravelry. I really should be sewing and not blogging, but the size of this robe means I need a lot of space to lay it out and its a bit windy outside. I refuse to chase a sleeve down the street. Any suggestions on what to use for pouch drawstrings besides satin cords? Something sturdy, as they will likely be hanging off a belt. At this point, I'm eyeing shoe laces (new, not used, nobody wants the smell of dirty feet on them). No, our costumes won't be strictly authentic for you sticklers. But they will be breathable and, for my sun allergy ridden husband, comfortable.